Friday, April 05, 2013

Writing after a long long time, but as long as it’s coming from the mind entangled with the heart, who cares.
         Of late I have been having this strange emotional fixes where things seem bright one day and the very next moment they are like dark clouds with the silver shining raped off. It’s like I have been seeing the brighter as well as the ugliest side both in the gap of a split second.
So I have been thinking a lot. I mean when your life is going nowhere and your college life is horrendously epic, you are left with nothing else to do than think. So I was thinking about some moments in my life which have made me actually go

                          व़ोट द फक 

 Yes!! I mean you use the F word a hell lot these days, but some moments flash up and these miraculous three words just drive past your eyes in Brick bold letters. i know i have done enough of cribbing i want to write something to god

dear God

I would like to ask you something for myself and this is new for me in my 21 yrs of existence. But I don’t want toys for I am too old for that.  I want you to kill for me. I want you to be generous enough to do some real red blood work for me. I have a list of people I want you to kill because I personally believe that they shouldn’t be alive.

1)      People who assume that I give a damn- So Mr god, there are a certain bunch of self conscious bimbos who believe that I live to hear out their bogus life crap. These dung balls don’t even find it important to know if I want to hear to their cries of madness or whether I am at least vaguely interested in their saga. Why do they assume that my ears are free for their nonchalant bashing of bullshit?

2)      People who bring babies to the theatre-  these people think that a red blood thumb sucking flesh, draped in a hello kitty piece of cloth understands a movie and thus is eligible to watch a 3 hour show with the normal brained plebeians like us. Now most of the time the movie itself is crappy and what makes it even more terrible is the bawling baby leaking mucus down my sleeve, because I always end up sitting beside such a booby parent.

3)      People other than my family who are interested in my future- So sir, I am in my final year of engineering and people have started enquiring about my future plans. That includes my career, my marriage and sometimes even the number of kids I want to reproduce. I live a very instant, on the edge life and I don’t think of the future, mostly because I am a lazy ass numb nut who isn’t yet serious about her own life. Please spoon out the eyes of those who ruin my mind by giving their opinions as to what I should do with my life, when they clearly aren’t successful in theirs. Oh kill them too!

4)      People who think they are fat but are clearly not- I don’t have a problem with the anorexic chicks. I have a problem when thin sticks come to a whale like me and ask me if they are fat. I have an issue with the fact that they choose me to voice an opinion regarding their body mass index. They think it’s justifiable to call themselves fat when they are half my size. I think it is their way to coyly and innocently call me fat, without getting an earful and an ass whipping from me. Use a chainsaw when you kill them please.

लिस्ट कभी कतम नहीं होगि…. please deal with the above on priority !


frustrated child *sigh*

p.s couldn't think of an apt title. :P :P


Anonymous said...

same goes with me ....i am amazed as to how can our thinking be so much same :)

Gaurav Sohgoura said...

ha ha ha means u hate Anki. (point no. 4). :P

sudeep said...

Good one Udi .. n i pray nobody (in future) writes something like this cos of u.. :P :D n then you would really say wat the fuck :D

♥●• İzdihër •●♥ said...

same here lol.

Ivan Aliku said...

lol. funny. You really wanna get some a*s kicked.

Dr. Virat Kuntalam said...

1. may be you make yourself easily available to these whining scums...may be you don't want to...but you end up listening...perhaps because you didn't wnat to hurt their feelings or be rude to them... Or simply, may be this post hasn't reached them yet...!!

2. have it occurred to you they too wanted to have a break once in a while... and they might have not found a babysitter... and most of the time these days babies are far entertaining than the 3hr shit-full of bollywood crap...!!

3. Empathise with you on this... story of most of the eligible bachelors...!!

4. lastly, if at all it consoles you...these skinny creatures basically suffer from body dysmorphic disorder... they have distorted self-image...the root cause of anorexia nervosa...! So, just have pity on them...

nice blog... by the way..! :)

udita said...

@GT no its not like that ,...she is a sweetheart and falls under not-so-irritating category :)

udita said...

@sudeep i will try not to turn into such a monster who can make miraculous three words just pop up in Brick bold letters.i have full sympathy with the innocent victims of the above class.

udita said...

@Dr sahab u very well analysed my mindset...i am glad that there exists a man who truly reads my mind and is so easily able to put them in words :) :)

udita said...

@Ivan i really want some blood work to be done in this case...damn these people...they should be disappeared from this planet without a trace :P

Shruti Khajuria said...

hahaha... wat a way to peen ur frustrations.. :p

Adhi Das said...

i just liked ur writing something so frank & cool calling our narrow minds to straighten up ..good style..hope God hears u.. udita smiles:.GOD<3U

Dhara said...

Your 4th point made me laugh out loud. Haha..It made me remind of my latest post, I wrote about women sizes and their issues.
Very funny and witty post.
Following you.

I am a new blogger and I would love if you could have a peek at my blog too and let me know, how I am doing.
Lots of love

Dhara said...

Wow, that music piece on your blog. I've heard it before but, couldn't figure out. Would you be kind enough to tell me?

Thank you.

udita said...

hi Dhara...the music is Latika's theme from slumdog millionaire

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Please email me back.


Ulti Khopdi said...

That piece of music was bugging me too!
That baby thing was a little mean,Dont u think?

udita said...

'@ulti Khopdi yeah i know it is mean...But you will surely agree with me when u experience a movie with a baby by ur side :P

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